Gluten free depression: Sadness accompanied with the news that you can no longer devour pizza, pop tarts, and copious amounts of cereal like some sort of wheat monster running rampant around the kitchen.
A few years ago I received the sad news that I could no longer eat wheat. After two days of back patch allergy testing(not fun), the sample that contained wheat inside made a small section of my back balloon in size–enough to tip the doctor off that yes, I was indeed intolerant to this evil substance.
It sucked though. I for one love pizza, and pop tarts, and cinnamon toast crunch, and waffles, and pancakes, and quesadillas, and yeah, pretty much everything made with wheat, okay? OH! And chocolate chip cookies!
And sugar cookies.
Okay, that’s it.
But seriously I also like doughnuts.
I’m guessing the majority of those reading this have never had to suddenly cut wheat out of their diet for no apparent reason, so I’ll explain how I felt with the immediate news.
I fell into a gluten free depression.
I remember walking through the grocery store, head down, passing everything I used to eat by like a ship in the night. Shout out to Matt Kearney. I know I’m writing with a very whimsical style right now, but it did suck big time.
I love food. Okay, I love junk food. And I used to deal with the stresses of life by eating copious amounts of it. Now I’d have to do the exact same thing, except deal with the really annoying side effects of it afterward.
The Five Steps Of Gluten Free Depression:
- Hoarding : After the news we hoard all of our gluten, thinking about whether we want to go through the side effects of eating it to drown our sorrow.
- Disbelief : Yeah, I kept trying to pinch myself to wake up out of this dream. But it wasn’t happening.
- Acceptance : You finally accept that eating gluten just isn’t in the cards for you anymore.
- Adjustment : There’s definitely an adjustment in diet during the gluten free depression.
- Stability : After a while, and here’s the good news, you do get used to this gluten free lifestyle, and here’s a little secret: It’s healthier!
After two months I got used to my new life. I learned how to cook(hello ladies!), manage portions, and become stable.
I realized there’s always something delicious to eat, no matter what diet you’ve been constrained to. I absolutely love eating meat. I found out that a properly cooked steak is the most delicious thing in the world. Yeah! Take that frosted blueberry pop tarts!
I also found that my entire diet became much healthier. Processed foods contain gluten 75% of the time(rough estimate), so I was forced to do some shopping on the outside of the grocery store. This means I was buying fruits, vegetables, and every kind of meat you can dream of.
My gluten free lifestyle also forced me to jump out of my culinary boundaries and start to cook for myself! And guess what? I love cooking. Cooking is so much fun because you’re taking a bunch of ingredients that don’t necessarily have anything to do with one another, and combining them to make something delicious.
The gluten free depression is a long, arduous process, but once you realize that there’s always something delicious to eat with any diet, then you’ll be just fine. Trust me, I know. Keep fighting.